i find this song extremely motivating :)
...starships were meant to fly
hands up, and touch the sky
can't stop, 'cause we’re so high
let's do this one more time...
nicki minaj - starships
the proof is in the pudding, literally... okay so maybe not literal pudding, but cupcakes, chocolate and other such goodies.
this was our first cheat weekend since starting the zone. we used to cheat weekly (which may be why we were losing weight at a snails pace), now we save it for the super special occasions. and though it was certainly a special weekend and i welcomed the indulgence, i can't say it went off 100% without a hitch.
the fact of the matter is our bodies adjust to habits, patterns, exercise, the way we eat... after 6 weeks in the zone my body has grown to expect the same thing daily, this includes very little sugar (unless it comes from fruit) and very few carbs (once again only from fruits or veggies). this weekend we blew both of those patterns out of the water. yes i gained a few lbs (of which i know will fall back off rapidly after a few days), but what bothers me the most is how i feel. at almost the first sight of high glycemic carbs and sugar my energy level was zapped. yesterday was the first day in a LONG time that i actually felt like i could use a nap and fell asleep watching TV on the couch. every weekend we have been pushing ourselves to run errands, hit the gym, etc and yesterday as much as we certainly needed the rest, i also didn't even have my normal energy to attempt to push myself.
being back to work today i was wondering why i was feeling kind of crabby for the first time in quite a while. then it hit me, my eating was completely off track for 3 days and my body was feeling it. when we started the zone diet i had felt like a fog had been lifted, literally. after just a few days eating poorly the fog rapidly returned. i am happy to know that it was just a weekend indulgence and that i am back on track and ready to push it hard again, but it was an interesting revelation to see just how well our bodies respond to eating a certain ratio of healthy foods. i actually look forward to our homemade chicken barley soup and salad for dinner tonight! which is something i love about this diet!
i should also mention the extreme pain i felt in my stomach from being WAY too full after our big fancy meals and the horrible time i had adjusting back to smaller portions today ... not so fun!
in other news, have been wanting to try p90x for a while now and i just saw that one of our girls (the one and only teela tucker) is trying the insanity workout. this has further peeked my interest. more to come on this later!
sorry for the lack of uppercase letters, i felt like trying something new in honor of today's lethargy lol.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
...thunder thighs!
Appropriate Whitney lyrics:
...I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I live as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all...
Whitney Houston - Greatest Love of All
I have officially lost 112lbs. I am 3lbs away from seeing a number that I honestly do not remember seeing since I am at least 15 or 16 years old (if that).
I have lost 17lbs in one month since starting The Zone (which includes a week of being sick and having to eat soup and crackers, which are not part of the plan).
So can someone PLEASE explain to me why I was just catapulted back to being 10 years old again and in 5th grade when the LOSER "Comedy Central Show" pusher down in Times Square told me I had big thighs?
Picture it, 1991. After losing 15lbs of baby fat I start 4th grade "thinner" than I had been since I was probably 6 years old. 2nd and 3rd grade were rough for me, immediately following my parents divorce and my first introduction to my Dad's struggles with staying "sober", my weight begins to increase.
The boys, who probably secretly liked me anyway, and some who were chubby themselves, coin an awesome name for me; "Thunder Thighs"... that name and the stigma attached to it have followed me for my entire life.
I had just LOST weight, how in gods name were they calling me THUNDER THIGHS? Here we go again, I have again just lost weight, how am I STILL being ridiculed for the way I look?! I wanted to turn around to the guy downstairs who thought it was necessary to disrespect and point out the size of a woman's thighs and either punch him or scream "YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN ME 112lbs AGO ... SORRY THAT YOU ARE JUST MISERABLE BECAUSE YOU PEDDLE COMEDY SHOWS IN TIMES SQUARE AND I AM A BEAUTIFUL SUCCESSFUL WOMAN THAT WOULD NEVER EVEN CONSIDER GLANCING IN YOUR DIRECTION" ... I honestly do not even KNOW what he looked like. I kept walking as he spoke to the back of me.
Will I ever break free of the name Thunder Thighs? Will my thighs EVER be thin? I honestly have no idea... Maybe it's just the way I am built ... but am I going to have to hear it forever? How am I going to learn to NOT be transmitted back to 10 year old me at the mention of the size of my thighs?
To be quite honest, I wasn't even that over weight... the problem is that being told I was over weight, being led to believe it was a problem, having it be the focus of everything I did or ate, etc... in a way it forced me to self fulfill a false prophecy. Tell someone they are something for long enough and they begin to believe it and become that something. When I began college I was the weight I am approaching now. There was no reason to let my weight balloon the way that it did, but I self fulfilled the prophecy I had been hearing since "Thunder Thighs" had begun being snickered in my direction in elementary school.
This is not meant to be a cry fest about being bullied ... it is my own journey. It is something I will work through and figure out. But I know one thing for sure, I will never again allow myself to self fulfill a false prophecy. And at least I now know, after coming this far, that it really doesn't matter who thinks my thighs are big or small or in between. What matters is how I feel about me ... I just have to keep reminding my 10 year old self of the same thing.
...I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I live as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all...
Whitney Houston - Greatest Love of All
I have officially lost 112lbs. I am 3lbs away from seeing a number that I honestly do not remember seeing since I am at least 15 or 16 years old (if that).
I have lost 17lbs in one month since starting The Zone (which includes a week of being sick and having to eat soup and crackers, which are not part of the plan).
So can someone PLEASE explain to me why I was just catapulted back to being 10 years old again and in 5th grade when the LOSER "Comedy Central Show" pusher down in Times Square told me I had big thighs?
Picture it, 1991. After losing 15lbs of baby fat I start 4th grade "thinner" than I had been since I was probably 6 years old. 2nd and 3rd grade were rough for me, immediately following my parents divorce and my first introduction to my Dad's struggles with staying "sober", my weight begins to increase.
The boys, who probably secretly liked me anyway, and some who were chubby themselves, coin an awesome name for me; "Thunder Thighs"... that name and the stigma attached to it have followed me for my entire life.
I had just LOST weight, how in gods name were they calling me THUNDER THIGHS? Here we go again, I have again just lost weight, how am I STILL being ridiculed for the way I look?! I wanted to turn around to the guy downstairs who thought it was necessary to disrespect and point out the size of a woman's thighs and either punch him or scream "YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN ME 112lbs AGO ... SORRY THAT YOU ARE JUST MISERABLE BECAUSE YOU PEDDLE COMEDY SHOWS IN TIMES SQUARE AND I AM A BEAUTIFUL SUCCESSFUL WOMAN THAT WOULD NEVER EVEN CONSIDER GLANCING IN YOUR DIRECTION" ... I honestly do not even KNOW what he looked like. I kept walking as he spoke to the back of me.
Will I ever break free of the name Thunder Thighs? Will my thighs EVER be thin? I honestly have no idea... Maybe it's just the way I am built ... but am I going to have to hear it forever? How am I going to learn to NOT be transmitted back to 10 year old me at the mention of the size of my thighs?
To be quite honest, I wasn't even that over weight... the problem is that being told I was over weight, being led to believe it was a problem, having it be the focus of everything I did or ate, etc... in a way it forced me to self fulfill a false prophecy. Tell someone they are something for long enough and they begin to believe it and become that something. When I began college I was the weight I am approaching now. There was no reason to let my weight balloon the way that it did, but I self fulfilled the prophecy I had been hearing since "Thunder Thighs" had begun being snickered in my direction in elementary school.
This is not meant to be a cry fest about being bullied ... it is my own journey. It is something I will work through and figure out. But I know one thing for sure, I will never again allow myself to self fulfill a false prophecy. And at least I now know, after coming this far, that it really doesn't matter who thinks my thighs are big or small or in between. What matters is how I feel about me ... I just have to keep reminding my 10 year old self of the same thing.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)